


Selected Variations on Reunification

by onemechanicalalligator



Series: In That Big Somewhere Out There [1]
Category: Community (TV)
Genre: Coming Out, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Hugs, Love Letters, M/M, Mutual Pining, Reunions, Secret Relationship, Unconventional Format
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-20
Updated: 2020-08-15
Packaged: 2021-03-04 20:22:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 17,885
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25412332
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/onemechanicalalligator/pseuds/onemechanicalalligator
Summary: Troy is coming home after three years on a boat, and everyone is worried about how Abed will handle it. They are unaware that Troy and Abed have been secretly been corresponding the entire time Troy's been gone.Starts when Troy leaves in season 5 and continues until Troy's return.
Relationships: Troy Barnes/Abed Nadir
Series: In That Big Somewhere Out There [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1883977
Comments: 167
Kudos: 353





	1. Into Darkness

Contrary to popular belief, Abed is not a robot or a computer or a magical elf-like man. He’s a real person, with real feelings, and when he falls in the lava and Britta and Troy clone him, he is fully aware that it isn’t real, that he’s still just Abed. But it does make the lava go away, the lava that his mind created, because even if he’s not those other things, he is still crazy, and he’s accepted that. 

He takes Clone Abed and makes him into a character, like a Don Draper or a Han Solo, one he can call upon to play when needed, and he needs Clone Abed now, because it’s the only way he’ll be able to say goodbye to Troy. And it’s real Troy, he knows that, even though they’re trying to help him by making Clone Troy, too, and it turns out to be a good thing because it lets Troy talk to LeVar Burton, but it doesn’t mean this isn’t still a real goodbye between human friends.

It’s a real goodbye and it’s a horrible goodbye and when it’s over, when the _Childish Tycoon_ has pulled out of the parking lot and he’s left with the rest of the group, he knows he should stay and talk to them, maybe hug them the way they are hugging each other, but he can’t. Instead, he runs. 

He runs away from the parking lot, away from Greendale, runs all the way to the apartment and up the stairs, stopping only to unlock the door. Then he runs across the apartment into Troy’s room, which is now his room, which used to be the Dreamatorium, and it’s switched ownership so many times it feels untethered, floating in space, a cosmic rest stop on the way to Something Better. Except Abed thinks that ends with him, because there is nothing better waiting for him, he had Something Better and he lost it and it is headed for the open sea, possibly never to return, because he knows the homing pigeon genes aren’t real, either.

He considers the bed and then changes his mind, goes to the corner of the room and folds himself up as small as he can and sits there on the floor, knees to his chest, taking big, gasping breaths, and it’s not because he’s out of shape, it’s because there’s this giant hole in his heart and he doesn’t know how to fill it back up, doesn’t know how to keep it from ripping open entirely, if it’s even possible or if he should accept the inevitability of it and move on.

There’s a pillow on the floor next to him and he reaches for it. He sets it on his knees and then presses his face into it and _screams,_ and _keeps screaming_ until his throat is raw, until he has a headache, until he unlocks something inside himself and begins to cry, and then he replaces the _screaming_ with _crying_ and he _cries and cries_ until the pillow is soaked and there’s snot everywhere and it’s disgusting so he yanks off the pillowcase and throws it on the floor.

His phone makes a noise, and he has a text from Annie saying she’ll be home in 10 or 15 minutes, so he lets himself cry into his knees for a few more minutes, his face stiff and crusty with salt in the cool air, wailing so loudly the neighbors will probably start banging on the walls soon, wondering if this is what it feels like to die. And when a few minutes are up he carefully stands, changes into a pair of jeans without tear stains on the knees, and walks to the bathroom to wash his face. When he looks reasonably normal, he goes back to his room and closes the door. He sits on his bed and practices being Clone Abed, because that’s how he got through saying goodbye to Troy, and that will have to be how he gets through living without him, at least when other people are around. They won’t know the difference, he’s sure, and he can be real Abed when no one’s around, if he absolutely has to, if he can’t find a way to just play Clone Abed forever so he won’t have to feel a thing.

Annie gets home and knocks on Abed’s door, and he tells her to come in. He’s sitting cross-legged on the bed, hands in his lap, and he gives her a small smile when she walks in.

“Abed, are you okay?” Annie asks, looking distraught. She sits down next to him on the bed and puts her hand on his back.

“I’m okay,” Clone Abed confirms with a nod. 

“You don’t have to pretend,” Annie says, and Abed realizes too late that his characterization of Clone Abed can’t be completely emotionless, or he won’t be believable to audiences.

“I’m sad,” he amends. “But everything will be okay.”

Annie gives him an odd look, one he can’t read at all, so he just ignores it and waits for her to say something using words. 

“It’s okay to be upset, Abed,” Annie says. “Troy is really important to you. We all understand that.”

“Okay,” Clone Abed says, out of his depth and floundering. He thought this would be easier.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Annie asks.

“I think I’d like to be alone for awhile,” Clone Abed says.

“Oh! Sure, of course,” Annie replies. “Just come out when you’re ready. I’ll make buttered noodles for dinner, okay?”

“Okay,” he says, and holds his breath until she’s gone, and then he picks up another pillow and presses it to his eyes as they start leaking, dimly thinking he’ll need to do laundry soon if he’s going to keep crying all over his pillowcases. 

And then he doesn’t think of anything anymore because he’s too focused on staying completely silent while he sobs, wondering if the ache in his chest is permanent.

Eventually he lays down on the bed and stares at the wall and feels the tears slide down his face and into his blanket. He kind of wishes he had a water bottle, because there can’t be much liquid left in his body, except there is, because he _can’t stop crying._ He doesn’t move until Annie calls him for dinner, and then he frantically wipes at his face with the blanket to try to clean it up, and he doesn’t have a mirror in his room so he has to just cross his fingers that he looks normal.

Annie gives him another odd look when he sits down to eat, but she doesn’t say anything about his appearance, so he figures he must have done an okay job. 

“Thank you for the noodles, Annie,” Clone Abed says politely.

“You’re welcome,” she says with a warm smile. “Look, do you want to talk about Tr--”

“Um,” says Clone Abed, because he doesn’t know what to say but he can’t let her finish that thought, and then he just kind of sits there frozen looking at Annie. He can feel how wide his eyes are, and he tries to make them normal but he doesn’t remember how normal eyes are supposed to feel, he never paid attention before.

“Nevermind,” Annie says quickly, pulling him out of his head. “Do you want to watch a movie?”

He doesn’t, but she looks so hopeful, and she _did_ make him buttered noodles, and she’s probably sad, too, so he nods and goes to the living room.

“Whatever you want,” he says, trying to smile, and she gives him a weird glance before picking out a romcom.

Usually when they watch movies together he and Annie will sit close together on the couch, because she gets very snuggly, but right now Abed can’t bear the thought of being so close to her, to anyone, not if he’s going to stay in character. He can’t afford to let his guard down, even for an hour and a half. So he sits in one of the chairs, and Annie looks sad, and he pretends he doesn’t notice, and the last time he felt this terrible was during the pillow/blanket war with Troy.

He’s never been so miserable during a movie, not even _The Phantom Menace,_ because while that threatened to kill a franchise and a genre, it at least didn’t threaten to kill _him._ Abed doesn’t know what dying actually feels like, but it can’t be too far off from this. 

As soon as the movie ends he jumps up and tells Annie he’s going to take a shower. He flies to the bathroom, yanks on the tap, and stumbles under the running water just in time to burst into tears. He vaguely notices he forgot to undress, and decides he doesn’t care, and then he slides down the tile wall until he’s sitting directly under the water and he gulps and gasps and hopes Annie can’t hear him.

He stays there until the water runs cold, and for awhile after that, and then he turns the water off but he stays in the bathtub, and eventually he decides maybe he can let Annie see the real Abed just one more time, just _today,_ because of course it would be normal for him to be sad _today,_ and he can try Clone Abed again tomorrow, and also he really doesn’t have another option because he’s soaking wet and he doesn’t want to get water all over the floor of the apartment.

He thinks about calling for Annie, but in the end he just shakes and cries, soaking in the bathtub, until there’s a tapping on the door, and he tries to stop crying, tries to sit perfectly still.

“Abed?” calls Annie. “Are you okay? You’ve been in there a long time.”

“Can you come in?” Abed croaks, thankful the lock on the door doesn’t work.

The door springs open and Annie bursts in, sees Abed in the bathtub, and is at his side in seconds. 

“Abed,” she says, and puts her hand on his back, even though his t-shirt and cardigan are both sopping wet. “Oh, Abed.”

He looks up and sees that she’s crying, and she looks like she’s maybe been crying for awhile, and he feels bad for hiding in the bathroom when she was sad.

“I miss him,” he says quietly, hugging his knees against himself. “You miss him, too.”

“We can miss him together,” Annie says. “You know you can talk to me.”

Abed doesn’t say anything. He doesn’t know what to say. He doesn’t want to talk about Troy, doesn’t want to talk about anything. He wishes he could be like the Wicked Witch of the West, when she melted in the water, and then she didn’t have to miss her sister anymore. 

“Or we don’t have to talk,” Annie adds. “We can just...be here for each other.”

“Okay,” Abed says, because he has to say something, and he does want them to be there for each other.

They have to be there for each other, because the apartment is weird without Troy in it, it’s too quiet and too big, and somehow the walls almost seem like they’re a different color, like they’re dingier somehow. Like there was a joy that permeated the space that’s gone, and now it’s cold and empty. Abed knows nothing has actually changed in the apartment, that his brain is making all this up, but that doesn’t mean he knows how to make it go back to the way it should be.

“Do you want me to bring you a towel? And some clothes?” Annie asks.

“Yes, please,” Abed says. “Pajamas. Bottom drawer.”

“Got it,” says Annie, and leaves the bathroom, and she’s back in a flash with two of her own big fluffy towels and Abed’s pajamas. She sets them on the floor.

“Thank you,” Abed says.

“You’re welcome. I’ll wait for you in the living room, okay?” 

Abed nods, and Annie leaves, closing the door behind her. It takes several minutes before Abed can bear to stand up. He’s sad, and exhausted from the day, and his clothes are all drenched and weighing him down. Eventually, he manages to undress and grab a towel and a few minutes later he is warm and dry, and he wonders if that will be enough to get him through the rest of the day.

He tosses his clothes and towels in the laundry and meets Annie in the living room, where she’s waiting on the couch, and this time he sits next to her, and she cuddles up to him.

“What would you like to do?” she asks.

“I don’t know,” Abed says, but it’s all wrong because Abed _always_ knows what to do, he always has a plan, a show to watch, a simulation to run, a scene to film, some kind of hijinks or adventure. 

But no, he always knows what to do with _Troy,_ and this is different and new and bad, this is terrifying, and how could he not have anticipated this, found a way to prepare? He wants to explain this to Annie, even opens his mouth to do so, but he can’t find the words. They’re stuck somewhere in his throat. So he sits there with his mouth open, and eventually he closes it, and she looks at him questioningly and he shrugs and pulls his legs up on the couch.

“Let’s watch something,” Annie says, and Abed nods, and she gets up to put in a DVD.

Abed doesn’t pay attention to what it is, which is a first for him, but he’s just so tired and sad. Annie comes back to the couch, and Abed isn’t sure how it happens but next thing he knows he’s leaning on _her_ , she’s got her arm around him, and he’s resting his head on her shoulder.

They don’t speak once through the entire movie, even though Abed is pretty sure neither of them are actually watching it. He tries to make some kind of sense of what he’s thinking or feeling but can’t, and instead just tries not to feel anything at all. He’s facing away from Annie, so he takes the opportunity to practice smiling, because it’s a skill he’ll need to perfect. It’s the key part of Clone Abed’s character. Eventually, exhausted, he feels himself start to doze off.

He wakes briefly when the movie ends.

“Keep sleeping,” Annie says. “I’ll turn everything off.”

“Annie,” Abed says, half asleep, not all there, just kind of mumbling.

“Yeah, Abed?” Annie says softly, and ruffles his hair.

“I love him, Annie,” Abed whispers, and then he can’t see from the tears that are flooding his eyes, so he just closes them, and lets himself be carried back to sleep.

He wakes up the next morning on the couch with a pillow under his head, a blanket over him, and a glass of water sitting on the coffee table. It’s confusing, and it takes him a minute to piece together what led to him sleeping on the couch. He remembers Troy leaving, of course, and running home, and trying to be Clone Abed, and deciding to put that off a day. There were buttered noodles in there somewhere. He remembers the two movies with Annie, and the shower incident in between. He thinks he must have fallen asleep during the second movie. 

“Good morning, Abed!” calls Annie from her bedroom.

Abed stands up straight and practices smiling, because he’s playing the role of Clone Abed for real now, and this time he won’t break character. 

“Hi,” Clone Abed says, and goes to her.

“We thought we might all go have brunch this morning,” Annie says. “The group, I mean. Just to, you know…” she trails off.

“Okay,” Clone Abed says, even though he doesn’t know. “I’ll go get dressed.”

“Um, Abed?” Annie says, and it seems like lately Annie is making more and more faces he doesn’t recognize. “Do you remember what you told me last night?”

Abed tries to shuffle again through the events of the night before, to remember anything he might have said to Annie. 

“We talked about missing Troy,” Clone Abed finally says. “I told you I miss Troy.”

“Yeah,” Annie says softly. “Okay. Um, ready to go in 10 minutes?”

“Sure thing,” he says, and goes to his bedroom to change.

Half an hour later they are at a diner with Jeff, Britta, and Shirley, and everyone is treating Abed as if he’s made of glass, because they don’t know he’s playing Clone Abed. It’s okay, though, because he really does feel like he’s made of glass, only not because he’s _breakable,_ but because he’s already been _broken._ He feels like he’s made of shattered glass, jagged shards and sharp chunks, and it hurts. He tries to ignore how much it hurts.

“How are you, Abed?” Britta asks, and everyone looks at him.

“Fine,” Clone Abed says, and it’s not even a lie, because they don’t know to ask about the spelling. Then he smiles, just like he’s been practicing.

“Are you sure?” Jeff says. “Because, you know, it’s okay to be--”

“I’m sure,” Clone Abed interrupts, and smiles again, and everyone is looking at him strangely, but he doesn’t care enough to try to interpret what it means, because playing this role is taking up all of his energy and then some.

The brunch probably doesn’t last very long, but it feels like forever, and when he and Annie finally get home Abed goes into his bedroom and curls up under his covers and cries until he falls asleep, and he’s very careful to stay quiet so Annie doesn’t come to check on him. When he wakes up he wipes his face and thinks about how he really needs to get a mirror for his bedroom, and then he goes out into the living room and smiles at Annie, and she smiles back, but it’s different, and Abed wonders if Troy was the reason he was finally able to kind of learn to read peoples’ faces, and now that Troy’s gone, he’s back to where he started, and every look is a mystery. It’s frustrating, but he guesses it’s not the end of the world, just another thing he needs to learn how to get used to.

The rest of the day is much like the day before. Annie is indulging him with buttered noodles to try to make him feel better, even though he’s doing his best to show her he’s not sad. They watch another movie, but again, he doesn’t actually pay attention. Thankfully there are no fully-clothed showers this time, and he is able to make it until bedtime before losing his grasp on Clone Abed again. 

Over the next few days, he begins to define a new normal. His bed becomes his nest, the place where he goes to cry, and it’s so strange because he never used to cry before. That’s another thing to add to the ever-growing list of Things That Changed When Troy Left. He hopes that as time goes by he’ll learn to read his friends’ faces again, but so far it seems like it’s getting worse, not better. Like they’re having conversations about him using only looks, and he wonders if it’s that they think he can’t see, or if it’s that they know he can’t understand.

It becomes easier to slip in and out of the role of Clone Abed, though, and after a while he doesn’t even have to think about it. It’s a routine, Clone Abed anytime he’s not in his bedroom. He’s never worked so hard on a character before.

When he is in his bedroom, though, and he drops the role, that’s when everything starts to come apart. Because when he’s not acting as Clone Abed, he’s just Abed-Without-Troy, and he hasn’t yet figured out how to make that okay. He doesn’t even know where to begin.


	2. First Contact

**_Selected Email Exchanges_ ** _**2014-2015  
**  
_

OCTOBER   
  


**_FROM:_ ** _Barnes, Troy_

**_TO:_ ** _Nadir, Abed_

**_SUBJ:_ ** _Super Secret Email_

_Dear Abed,_

_I hope you’re not mad that it took me almost 8 months to write to you. There was a whole thing with some pirates (we’re fine, but they took my laptop, among other things) and it’s hard to get good wifi on the ocean, and I’ve been looking for internet cafes in the cities where we stop only apparently those aren’t so much of a thing anymore? Or else I’m bad at finding them. Anyway, I finally have a new laptop that I’ll pay LeVar back for once I’m rich at the end of this whole thing, whenever that is. It already feels like it’s taking forever._

_Look, can you do me a huge favor? I feel like such a bad person asking this, but. Please don’t tell anyone else in the group that I emailed you. I love them so much, I love all of you so much, and it’s too hard to do this if I’m remembering that all the time. I have to set some kind of boundary. I hope they’ll forgive me when I come back. That sounds so terrible, and it hurts, but it's honestly the only way I can get through this._

_You’re different, because I don’t think I could survive another minute without talking to you. I’ve been losing my mind, Abed, and I know I’m supposed to be Clone Troy who’s fine with it and everything but it’s not working, I’m not Clone Troy, I’m Troy-Without-Abed, and that’s not who I want to be. I hate this so much, I feel like something’s missing, something really important that I can’t live without._

_Sorry, man, this is starting to sound like a love letter, and I hope I’m not freaking you out. I just really, really, really, really, really miss you._

_Can we keep emailing? Like, be pen pals or something? I don’t know how often I can write but I promise to as much as I can. You don’t have to keep me up-to-date on the group if you don't want to. I feel like a dick for not talking to them, so it’s kind of what I deserve. But I would love to know what’s going on with you._

_I hope this is okay._

_Troy_

**_FROM:_ ** _Nadir, Abed_

**_TO:_ ** _Barnes, Troy_

**_SUBJ:_ ** _RE: Super Secret Email_

_Dear Troy,_

_Your email came as quite a shock. I had pretty much accepted that I wouldn’t hear from you again._

_That’s not true, I’m sorry. Friends don’t lie. I could never accept that I wouldn’t hear from you again. I just tried not to think about it because it hurt too much. But I kept hoping._

_I think you’re the one who kind of taught me how to hope, you know, in the first place._

_I’ve been playing the role of Clone Abed since you left, because Clone Abed doesn’t have very many feelings, and it’s the only way to survive. I think the rest of the group is used to it by now. They make weird faces sometimes, but I can’t tell what they mean, because you aren’t there to explain. That’s not your fault for leaving. It’s my own for not understanding. It’s funny you should mention Troy-Without-Abed, because the purpose of Clone Abed is to take the place of Abed-Without-Troy._

_I won’t tell the group that we’re corresponding. Actually, I kind of like the idea of it being our secret. I love all of them, but there’s a lot I feel like I can’t tell them anymore. They’re afraid of breaking me, and I’m afraid of disappointing them. It almost feels like our show has changed networks. We’ve definitely switched up the cast. Shirley moved to Atlanta, and we have Frankie and Elroy now. You’d like both of them, I think._

_I don’t mind if it sounds like a love letter. I really x 5 miss you too._

_Abed_

* * *

  
DECEMBER   
  


**_FROM:_ ** _Barnes, Troy_

**_TO:_ ** _Nadir, Abed_

**_SUBJ:_ ** _Awesome_

_Dear Abed,_

_It’s been so great getting to talk to you again, even if it’s just by email. Like, my enjoyment of this trip has gone up over the last few months knowing that I get to tell you about it, and hearing about how things are going for you. Thanks for always writing back to me. I wish you could be here with me. We could have so much fun on this boat._

_How is everyone? Has Jeff tried to bone Frankie yet? How are things at home with Annie?_

_Did I mention I miss you? Sorry, it’s kind of all I can think about sometimes. Is that weird? I’ve never had a friendship like this before, so sometimes I don’t know. If it’s weird or not. Everything is just better when you’re around, you know?_

_I don’t think I realized it until we were apart. How important you are to me, and how much you’re a part of everything I do and think and feel. Like I think I kind of took you for granted, maybe, or at least the fact that you were always there. I didn’t realize how bad it would be not to have you around._

_I haven’t decided yet if this is worth the money at the end. I thought I needed to go find myself or something, and maybe I do, but I would just rather do that with you by my side. Who says you can’t find yourself with your best friend along with you? Pierce, I guess, that’s who._

_Troy_

**_FROM:_ ** _Nadir, Abed_

**_TO:_ ** _Barnes, Troy_

**_SUBJ:_ ** _RE: Awesome_

_Dear Troy,_

_It’s nice to talk to you, too. Since we’ve been writing, I’ve finally been able to stop playing Clone Abed. My default has reverted back to Original Abed, instead of Abed-Without-Troy, I guess because I’m not really without you anymore. As long as we have a connection, I think it will be okay._

_Frankie is kind of assertive and I don’t think she’s the right leading lady for Jeff. Also I suspect she might be a lesbian. It’s a relief, because she’s actually pretty great, and I’d rather avoid Jeff causing any unnecessary drama. Honestly, I’m a little worried about him. He seems to be drinking even more than usual, including at work. Something to keep an eye on._

_Annie is good, the same as ever. She keeps looking at me weird, the way everyone else does, even now that I’m Original Abed again, and I don’t know why. I know the group all think I’m fragile still, but it seems like more than that. Like they’re more worried than they should be. LIke I’m doing something wrong, and no one will tell me what it is. I don’t know how to fix it, or if that’s even the problem, so I just ignore it mostly._

_It’ll be worth the money, Troy, because then you’ll never have to fix another air conditioner or worry about rent or food or costumes or anything. It’s a safety net, and in this economy you can’t be too safe. (I don’t know, that just sounded like a thing adults say. But I think maybe it’s actually true?) It sucks being apart, but it’ll be that much better when we have our reunion scene at the end._

_I miss you, and I think of you all the time, and I don’t know if it’s normal because I never really had friends before, and I definitely didn’t have friends who left to sail around the world. But we’ve always done our own thing, right? So I’m going to assume it’s just fine._

_Abed_

* * *

  
JANUARY   
  


**_FROM:_ ** _Barnes, Troy_

**_TO:_ ** _Nadir, Abed_

**_SUBJ:_ ** _What if this was a love letter?_

_I’m sending this before I can change my mind._

**_FROM:_ ** _Nadir, Abed_

**_TO:_ ** _Barnes, Troy_

**_SUBJ:_ ** _RE: What if this was a love letter?_

_Then I’d write one back and we’d start making up for lost time._

* * *

  
FEBRUARY   
  


**_FROM:_ ** _Barnes, Troy_

**_TO:_ ** _Nadir, Abed_

**_SUBJ:_ ** _Okay_

_Dear Abed,_

_Sorry I waited so long to write back to you. I kind of freaked out after my last email, even though your response was better than I could have ever expected or hoped._

_I realized I loved you before we even left sight of Greendale, which was maybe the worst time to figure it out, and for a second I thought about jumping off the boat and running back to you. Except then I would have probably broken my legs and that would suck. And also, I was scared. Then I wanted to tell you in my first email, but I didn’t. And...yeah._

_I don’t know if this is a love letter, but just in case it is, here are some things I love about you:_

_Your brain, your smile, your imagination, your knowledge about TV, your love of movies, the fact that you speak three languages_

_There are a lot more, but I’m gonna be on this boat for a really long time and I have lots more letters to write to you. So I’ll save some for next time._

_How’s this for a sign-off:_

_I miss you and I love you._

_Love, Troy_

**_FROM:_ ** _Nadir, Abed_

**_TO:_ ** _Barnes, Troy_

**_SUBJ:_ ** _RE: Okay_

_Dear Troy,_

_I’ve never gotten a love letter before, but even so, I would say that was a pretty good one. You hit all the main points (how long you’ve loved me, things you love about me, missing me, etc). I’d call it a success._

_I’ll try my best to write one back, but I don’t have experience and I’m not great with emotions sometimes._

_I knew I loved you while you were still in Greendale, and I didn’t tell you because I was also scared. That’s my confession. I hate that I didn’t, but I didn’t think it was possible that you might love me back, and I didn’t want to lose you. And then I lost you anyway, for awhile, and I wished I’d said something, except then you contacted me and I still didn’t say anything, so I don’t know what that says about me._

_I miss your face and your heart and your hugs and watching movies with you and running simulations with you and making wishes in the fountain._

_Everything feels empty without you here. The apartment is weird since you left, and I know I’m imagining that, and I kind of thought my brain would have put it back to normal by now. But it hasn’t._

_Annie keeps trying to get me to talk about you, and I don’t want to. She seems really obsessed with the idea, though, and I don’t know why. Maybe she just really misses you and wants to talk about it with someone, and I’m closest by since I live with her. Except Britta lives here too, now, so that still doesn’t make sense._

_What we have now is called an epistolary relationship. Did you know that? It’s when you have a relationship through letters, or, in our case, emails._

_Did you know you’ve been gone for a whole year already?_

_I’ll copy your sign-off, because I like it:_

_I miss you and I love you._

_Love, Abed_

* * *

  
APRIL   
  


**_FROM:_ ** _Nadir, Abed_

**_TO:_ ** _Barnes, Troy_

**_SUBJ:_ ** _Another Love Letter_

_Dear Troy,_

_I wish you were here. For the millionth time, I’m irritated that I’m finally allowed to kiss you and I can’t._

_I have all your emails saved in a folder called Love Letters, and it’s in a secret file on my computer even though I know no one will ever go looking for it, and if they did, they wouldn’t suspect they were from you, anyway. I read them sometimes when I can’t sleep and a movie doesn’t feel like enough to fill the hole in my heart. It’s still there, after 14 months, and I think it’ll stay there until you get back._

_Greendale is still full of hijinks but they aren’t the same without you. Jeff seems to be angry more, I think because he feels his character growth is stagnating, but it kind of seems like he’s taking it out on me sometimes. You aren’t here to tone me down or mellow me out, I guess, and he can’t handle all of me all the time._

_Annie gets weird every time you come up in conversation. She talks to me about you like I’m your widow, even though I don’t remember ever telling her about my feelings for you. She probably thinks you aren’t ever coming back, the way I used to. So I guess I can’t really blame her for being so sad. It’s still strange, though. I feel bad not telling the truth, but then I think about how happy she’ll be when you do come back, and that makes it easier. I’m not saying you’re doing the wrong thing by not contacting anyone. That’s your choice and I respect it._

_I keep thinking about all the time we lost, the time we could have been together and weren’t, if we’d known earlier, if we’d been honest earlier. Everyone used to make jokes about us dating, and we could have actually been dating, only we weren’t, and I know the problem isn’t that it’s Too Late, it’s just that it’s Not Yet, but I still hate it._

_I miss you and I love you._

_Love, Abed_

**_FROM:_ ** _Barnes, Troy_

**_TO:_ ** _Nadir, Abed_

**_SUBJ:_ ** _RE: Another Love Letter_

_Dear Abed,_

_I miss you too, and I also hate that we missed out on that time. But we’ll have to make up for it by being extra awesome when I finally get back, I guess. At least, that’s what I’m planning, because I need something to look forward to._

_It’s not that I hate this trip, except I kind of do sometimes. And I feel bad for not enjoying myself more, but then I remember that Pierce made me do this, and he was kind of a dick, and I don’t owe him anything, not even my happiness. I’m trying to stay positive to be a good companion to LeVar, and I guess it’s working. I finally gave up and told him about you, about us, and he said that made a lot of sense, and now he just seems to pity me, which is better than being annoyed with me all the time, I guess. To be fair, we’ve been each other’s only company in a small space for over a year now. He annoys me, too._

_I want to be with you. I want to watch movies with you and run simulations with you and do all of the dumb stuff we used to do together at Greendale. Being on this boat has forced me to grow up and do a lot less fun stuff and it’s not what I want. Not at all._

_I’m using this whole love letter to complain about shit, and that sucks, and I’m sorry._

_Other things I miss: your eyes, your hands, your mouth, and yes, I noticed all that stuff about you even before I realized I was in love with you, because I am an idiot. An idiot, Abed!_

_I’m sorry for making you keep our emailing a secret, and I appreciate your understanding, and I know it’s not a very nice thing to do. Sometimes I think about writing to the others, or asking you to talk to them, but it’s overwhelming and I get freaked out and I just think if I do that, I’ll end up stopping the trip early because I can’t take this anymore. And I don’t want this all to be a waste, you know? I don’t want us being apart to be for nothing._

_I miss you and I love you._

_Love, Troy_

* * *

  
MAY   
  


**_FROM:_ ** _Nadir, Abed_

**_TO:_ ** _Barnes, Troy_

**_SUBJ:_ ** _News_

_Dear Troy,_

_I have big news to share with you, which is that I’m moving to Los Angeles. Soon. Like, in a couple of weeks. I got a job as PA on a TV show about a video game studio, and I’m really excited about it, and also kind of scared. Except after being away from you for so long and surviving, I know I can survive anything, including moving to a new state all by myself. So I guess maybe that’s a positive thing that came from you leaving? But maybe not, because if you hadn’t left, maybe you’d be going with me._

_I haven’t told anyone else in the group yet. I’m not too worried about telling Frankie or Elroy, because we’re not that close. Britta and Annie I think will be excited, and I’m pretty sure Annie has plans to leave here too, although I’m not sure where she’s going, because she hasn’t actually talked to me about it yet, she’s just not great at being subtle. I’m really worried about telling Jeff, because he freaked out at me a while ago about everyone leaving, like really freaked out, and now I’m leaving, too. I know he’ll be okay, but I’m not sure that he knows that yet, and that’s what makes me nervous._

_I hope that whenever your trip is over, you’ll come to LA to see me, if I’m still there. I know you’re not going to be back anytime soon, and a lot could happen in that time. I guess what I’m saying is, I hope wherever I end up when you get home, you’ll come see me. And we’ll make a plan, and figure out a way to be together._

_It’s weird to think about moving away from the place I’ve lived my whole life, and about leaving Greendale, and the only real friends I’ve ever had. Six years ago when we met I would have never imagined that this is how things would turn out, that we’d all still be a group, that you’d be gone, that I’d love you, that I’d leave. I probably thought I’d be working back at my dad’s falafel stand by now._

_I think you can understand how I’m feeling, since you’ve been moving around to a lot of different places. I can’t wait for you to tell me all about them, and show me your pictures._

_I miss you and I love you._

_Love, Abed_

**_FROM:_ ** _Barnes, Troy_

**_TO:_ ** _Nadir, Abed_

**_SUBJ:_ ** _RE: News_

_Dear Abed,_

_That’s amazing news! I’m so excited for you. That’s like, your dream, right? To work on a TV show. Wow. Someday you’re going to be famous, you know._

_Even though I’ve been gone for so long, it’s strange to think about you leaving because in my mind nothing has changed at Greendale. I picture Shirley still being there, and even Pierce sometimes. It’s weird to think about going back there when all this is over and having everyone be gone. I still kind of think of Greendale as home, I think. I’m probably just going to keep thinking that, even if I really know that things are changing, because it’s too confusing to imagine my home being gone or split up._

_I hope it goes well, telling Jeff and everyone. I bet everyone will be so happy for you, even if Jeff is sad about you leaving. I bet everyone will be sad about you leaving. How could they not be? You’re the best._

_Are you going to get your own apartment when you get there? I mean, obviously, right? But do you think you’ll have roommates, or live on your own? I don’t really know anything about LA, to be honest. But I definitely want to come see you there when I get back, or wherever you’re living at that point._

_By the way, I watched the movie you sent me, that weird sci-fi one that kind of had Chang in it? I can see why you were so upset, because it’s really bad, but it’s also kind of cool with the effects and stuff? Mostly it just made me miss you guys, because I wish I could have been there to make it with you, and maybe I could have helped convince the others not to ruin it, but if not, it still would have been a lot of fun to be in._

_I really miss making movies with you, like those documentaries you did, or Kickpuncher. How did we film a Kickpuncher sex scene and not realize we were in love with each other, by the way? How is that even possible? You have no idea how much I think about that now, here, alone on this boat in the middle of the dumb ocean. I think about a lot of the things we did and it’s like they’re all different now. Like I’m remembering them but with new information. Does that make sense?_

_If I had known how long it was going to take to sail around the world, I probably wouldn’t have done it. If I had known pirates were real, I definitely wouldn’t have done it. I don’t know how much longer we have, but it’s definitely gonna be a while. I don’t know if we’re even half done, because things keep coming up, and I hate it._

_I know I complain a lot and I’m sorry. I don’t really have anyone else to complain to. I hope you don’t mind._

_I miss you and I love you._

_Love, Troy_


	3. Beyond

It’s about six months before Abed begins to feel at home in Los Angeles. He manages to find a studio apartment he can afford, which is a small miracle and a huge relief because he really doesn’t want to live with strangers. It’s sparsely furnished, but he has what he needs: his movies, his computer, a bed, and a whole lot of buttered noodles. Annie makes him text her a picture of his fridge once a week so she can make sure he’s eating more than just the noodles, which is probably for the best, even if he doesn’t want to admit it. He’s a creature of habit and hates to cook, but those bags of vegetables that steam in the microwave are a lifesaver.

Troy is with him every step of the way, sending encouraging emails as he packs and moves, listening to Abed’s anxiety about leaving his friends and his relief when Jeff hugs him twice at the airport, because maybe that’s a sign that he’ll be okay. Abed sends him pictures of the apartment, the neighborhood, even the set of the show where he’s working. He sends them to Annie, too, because it’s fun how she gets so excited, and she sends pictures of her own surroundings in return.

Around the two-year mark of Troy’s trip, he manages to figure out a way to use Skype when their boat is docked. Seeing his face for the first time in so long is such a shock for Abed that he can’t speak, and Troy thinks the sound isn’t working, and starts frantically messing with the settings until Abed finally remembers he can type messages, too. Troy’s hair is longer, and he has a beard, but besides that he’s the same, he’s just Troy, and it’s one of the few times Abed wishes he didn’t have to keep their correspondence a secret, because he doesn’t know what to do with the overwhelming emotions that are crashing on him like waves.

After that they try to Skype whenever they can, usually every few weeks, and they settle into a comfortable routine. In some ways it’s better to be able to see Troy, to remember his face and the way he sounds and moves. In some ways it makes it harder, though, knowing he’s so close but so far away, not being able to reach out and touch him. They talk about their days, their feelings, their adventures. They talk about the ways in which they miss each other and love each other, want each other and need each other. 

Annie comes to visit for a few days, and she stays with Abed, so he and Troy have to stick to email. She shares his bed, because he doesn’t have a couch, but it’s not weird. They used to fall asleep together all the time at their old apartment, especially after Troy left. It’s a nice visit; Abed takes Annie sightseeing and they go to the beach. They stay up late every night watching movies and it almost feels like the old days. She promises to come visit often, but things come up and schedules are complicated and months pass, and they settle for occasional phone calls and Skype calls, and they both figure it’s enough, at least for now.

Abed starts his first Thanksgiving in LA alone, eating a turkey sandwich and watching all of the Thanksgiving episodes of  _ Friends, _ and he doesn't realize he's lonely until he gets a Skype call from Troy, and he doesn't realize how lonely he was until Troy asks if he's crying. And sure enough, there are tears streaming down his cheeks, and once he's aware of that he's hit with a wave of despair, and Troy talks to him for hours, comforting him, loving him, until he loses the signal. Abed falls asleep alone with his arms wrapped around his middle, half of his sandwich still sitting on the counter. 

The year flies by. Abed gets into a routine, one that’s easy to keep because he has no roommates and there are no antics like at Greendale. He gets to know his coworkers, and sometimes he goes out for drinks with them. He starts running on the beach whenever he can, and he loves it, the way the salty air feels on his skin, and the breeze off the water blowing through his hair. Pretty soon he doesn’t know how he lived without this, how he was able to settle for sidewalks and forest paths in Colorado. It makes him certain that he’s come to the right place, that he belongs here. He tells Troy about it, and Troy understands a little, because he’s learning to love the ocean, and he tells Abed he’ll be glad to move to LA when he gets home, and that’s where they can begin their life together.

One day Abed is wandering around and he finds a touristy little shop that sells novelty buttons, tiny ones, maybe the size of a quarter, which is also how much they cost. There’s one with Spiderman on it, and it makes him think of Troy, so he buys it and puts it on a shelf in his bedroom. From that point forward, every time he finds a cheap little trinket that reminds him of Troy, he buys it, and when he has a collection built up he puts them all in an empty jar, and he keeps building his collection, hoping the jar will be full by the time Troy gets home. There are other buttons, one that says  _ I aim to misbehave, _ and one with a picture of Kickpuncher. There are little figurines of Inspector Spacetime and Constable Reggie and Geneva, of course. And then there are random things that Abed just knows Troy will like: a red plastic sailboat, a miniature set of wind-up chattering teeth, a bunch of poker chips painted to look like chocolate chip cookies. He doesn’t tell Troy about the jar. He wants it to be a surprise.

He thinks about trying to find a hobby, something besides running and watching movies to occupy his time, and he settles for yoga, because he remembers Annie telling him he’d be good at it, and he’s heard it’s good for runners, and for high-strung people, and he’s kind of both of those things. He doesn’t want to pay for a class so he finds a video podcast, and he sets up a little corner of his apartment with a yoga mat and some candles and a place to put his computer so he can comfortably see it while he stretches. It’s fun, and it feels good on his body and on his brain, and Annie is excited when he tells her, and she starts sending him her favorite yoga videos. Troy wants to try it, too, but he can’t get his balance on the boat, so Abed promises he’ll teach him when he’s home.

Yoga grounds Abed when he feels like he’s floating, when he’s not sure if he’s totally real, or if he’s fully occupying his own body. It helps when he needs pressure, the kind of pressure he used to get from Troy laying on him, the kind he gets from his weighted blanket. A deep pressure in his joints and muscles that makes him feel safe and calm. He never knew he could get that kind of relief just from stretching, and to be honest, he’s kind of irritated that he could have been doing yoga this whole time and wasn’t, because he didn’t know.

The second year he goes back to Colorado for Thanksgiving. He stays with his dad, and for the actual holiday Jeff and Britta host everyone at their house, because apparently they’re living together now, and no one is quite sure if they’re roommates or if they’re dating, and they seem to think it’s funny not to clarify. Annie comes, and Frankie, and Shirley flies in from Atlanta because her kids are with their dad this year, and even Dean Pelton, who is now known as Craig, shows up, because he and Jeff and Britta are friends now, apparently. All in all, it’s a pretty great reunion.

When dinner is over they all sprawl out in Jeff and Britta’s living room, full and sleepy and happy, and play “Remember That Time?” And it’s a perfect game for reminiscing about Greendale. There are six seasons worth of stories to tell, and somehow the more removed they are in time, the more unbelievable they seem, even though they were all there, they lived it, they did those things.

It’s not so awkward when the subject of Troy comes up, not the way it used to be, but Abed still catches everyone looking at him, trying to be discreet, just a quick glance,  _ how’s Abed holding up, is it okay to talk about this? _ He wants to stand up and say,  _ it’s fine, I’m not going to break, you don’t have to be like this. _ He wants to say, _ I survived, didn’t I? I’m still standing, and Troy’s been gone for almost three years. _ He wants to say,  _ I talk to Troy more often than I talk to any of you, and we’re in love, did you know that? _ But they don’t know that, and they can’t know that, so instead he just sits there and pretends not to see them watching him, the concerned expressions on their faces.

He tries to explain how he keeps busy with work and running and yoga, and they’re concerned that he needs to make more friends, that he needs to be social, that he needs to do  _ something, _ because the time he spends talking to Troy is unaccounted for in their minds. And he knows on some level they’re right, maybe he does need to get out more. But Troy is his lifeline, especially when he has Bad Days, and he doesn’t like to tell his other friends that he still has Bad Days because he doesn’t want them to worry. Troy worries, but not in an overbearing way, because he knows Abed is going to be fine, and he makes sure Abed knows that, too.

Britta doesn’t try to therapize him, because she finally learned her lesson, and also she’s a real therapist now, and she knows about things like ethics. She does try to get him to talk about Troy, and he refuses, and she wants to know why. He doesn’t know what to say, so eventually he settles on telling her it makes him sad, which is a lie, but he’s telling it for Troy, and that has to count for something. Britta gets that look on her face and apologizes, and Abed shrugs, and she hugs him, and he forces himself to hug back. It’s not Britta’s fault she has no idea what’s going on.

Jeff asks him about his life in LA, and he tries not to sound like he’s checking up on Abed, making sure he’s okay, but that’s exactly what he is doing. Abed calls him out on it and he at least has the decency to blush, and then he asks about the show that Abed’s working on. Abed talks and talks and forgets to breathe a few times because he’s so focused on the subject at hand, and Jeff cares enough to just keep listening, which is new, and Abed appreciates it. When he finally stops talking, Jeff tells Abed he misses him, and Abed tells Jeff he misses him too, and their hug is a good one. Jeff’s always are.

Shirley tells Abed about her life in Atlanta, and Abed is kind of talked out after Britta and Jeff, so he lets her go on and on about her family, her kids, her baking. He doesn’t interrupt, just nods and smiles and occasionally asks polite questions that keep her talking, and that’s something he only really learned how to do recently, and he’s proud of himself every time it works. When she’s done telling him about everything she gives him a hug, too, and Shirley’s hugs are warm and sweet and remind him a little bit of his mom, he thinks, or maybe it’s just past-Shirley he’s remembering.

Frankie tells him about Greendale, which is as crazy and unbelievable as ever, and Abed misses it, he feels the ache in his heart, the one that used to be reserved completely for Troy. Now it’s for everything he misses, and Greendale is one of the biggest things. Greendale, where he learned to have friends, and to be his own person, and to make movies, and to play paintball, and to fall in love. He kind of spaces out, thinking about it, but Frankie doesn’t seem to mind, and when they finish talking she asks if he wants a hug, and he says not really, and she looks relieved. They shake hands, and it’s not weird.

Craig makes small talk, which Abed is terrible at, and it’s strange and uncomfortable and then he tells Abed they all miss him, they really do, and remember how he and Troy used to have a morning show, and how cute was that? And Abed gets a little choked up at that, actually, remembering  _ Troy and Abed in the Morning, _ and he thanks Craig for the memory, and Craig gives him a giant hug and doesn’t seem to mind when Abed doesn’t hug back because he just can’t do it again right now.

Annie pulls him to the couch and then curls up against him the way she used to do when they lived together. She tells him all about how things are going in DC, and her ups and downs, the good and the bad. He listens and hums and lets her vent, and when she’s done Abed suggests they start doing weekly phone or Skype calls, because he misses her, and really it’s because he thinks she’s lonely and has no one to talk to, but he doesn’t want her to know that he knows. She agrees enthusiastically, and they put it into their calendars together so they don’t have an excuse not to do it. At the end of the night she wraps him in a hug and he hugs her back, because she needs it, and he does too. It’s a long hug, a warm one. Abed thinks it’s one of his favorite hugs ever.

As frustrating as they can be, Abed loves his friends, who will always be the study group to him, even if they haven’t studied together in years. It’s easy to forget how much he loves them when he doesn’t see them every day, but the Thanksgiving visit makes it fresh again, and later he will miss them almost as much as he did when he first moved. He finds he’s actually a little grateful for the abundance of hugs, like maybe he needed that.

That night he and his dad stay up late watching  _ The Breakfast Club, _ and that’s how Abed knows his dad really misses him, because he never agrees to watch  _ The Breakfast Club _ with Abed, not since Abed was in junior high and he watched the video so many times he wore out the tape. It’s fun, and he tells his dad about his job and his life in LA, and he doesn’t plan it, but he ends up telling his dad about Troy, about the boat trip and the letters and how they’re dating now. 

In some ways he guesses this is his big “coming out” moment, because he’s never broached the subject with his dad before, and he really doesn’t know what to expect. His dad doesn’t strike him as homophobic, but Abed’s seen enough movies to know that sometimes it’s different when it’s your kid. He doesn’t beat around the bush, just comes out with it,  _ Baba, I’m in a relationship with a man. You met him before, it’s Troy, do you remember? He left on a boat. _

His dad is silent for a moment and then he takes Abed’s hands and squeezes them, asks him if he’s sure, and Abed nods. He tells Abed he’s happy for him, happy that he’s found love, and he does remember Troy, and he’s a good person. He tells Abed he loves him so much, and he’s glad he told him, and Abed asks him if he’s mad, even a little, and he says no. He says life is too short to be mad at people for being happy, as long as their happiness isn’t hurting others, and Abed’s happiness is pure and good.

Abed cries then, and his dad cries, too, and they hug, it’s a day of so many hugs. And the last time he and his dad hugged and cried was when Abed left for LA, only that was different, that was bittersweet, it was quiet and quick. This is emotional, and it’s big, and it lasts for the whole credit crawl at the end of the movie. He feels like his relationship with his dad has changed somehow, has leveled up. He feels like maybe his dad finally knows the True Abed, and he loves him, and that feels good.

He gets back to LA and things haven’t changed in the four days he’s been gone, but  _ he’s _ changed, he feels lighter, and at the same time more grounded. He sends Troy a long email, tells him all about it, about seeing their friends, and all the hugs, and talking to his dad. Troy responds by calling him on Skype outside their scheduled meeting so Abed can tell him all the details right away. Troy wants to know all of it, every bit. 

Abed falls back into his normal schedule of work, running, yoga, calls with Annie and Troy, and movies whenever he can fit them in. Time goes by quickly, before he knows it’s Christmas, and he’s sure he sent his mom his new address, but she doesn’t send a card, doesn’t call or anything, and he feels bad that Troy’s the one who has to deal with that fallout, video chatting with a blank Abed who types instead of talking because his words are gone, and Troy is so far away and there’s nothing he can do. It takes a full 24 hours before Abed can speak again, and he uses that time to write a very long apology email to Troy, and Troy tells him to quit being silly, he doesn’t need to apologize.

The new year comes and Abed knows Troy is almost to the end of the trip, and he’s pretty sure Troy knows that he knows, but he doesn’t say anything, so Abed doesn’t either. He’s keeping track of the places Troy docks, he has been since Troy left, and he can’t remember if he ever told Troy that. He figures Troy will bring it up when he’s ready, and until then he tries not to think about it. He doesn’t want to get his hopes up, to put Troy on a timeline that doesn’t exist. 

He feels fully at home in LA, with this weird little life he’s created for himself, and it’s comfortable and good and almost perfect. He feels healthy and safe and almost whole. It’s almost everything he’s ever wanted.


	4. The Voyage Home

“Hello?”

“Annie?”

“Hey, Abed! What’s up? Don’t we usually talk on Thursdays?”

“Yes. But I have information to pass along and I thought you’d want to have it sooner rather than later.”

“Ooh, what information?”

“I heard from Troy.”

“You _what?!_ How? When??”

“I heard from Troy. He emailed me this morning. He’s coming home, Annie.”

“Oh my god! Abed! When?”

“Two weeks from Saturday. He’s...he’ll be docking in LA.”

“In LA? Did he...why LA?”

“It’s, um...it’s where the lawyers are? I guess? To get Pierce’s inheritance figured out.”

“That’s weird. Right? It’s weird. A crazy coincidence.”

“Yeah, it’s a really weird coincidence. Anyway, he wanted me to see if everyone would be able to come out here. The study group, I mean. You and Jeff and Britta and Shirley. To be there when he arrives. I know it’s short notice, but it’s a holiday weekend, so…”

“I’ll be there. I have flex time at work, it’s fine, I’ll figure it out. I...I’ve missed him so much.”

“Me too.”

“I know.”

“Will you let me know your flight information when you get it?”

“Yeah, for sure. Should I get a hotel room, do you think?”

“Yes. I...kind of already told Troy he could stay with me. And you know how small my apartment is.”

“Oh! Yeah, definitely. That’s...that’s good that he’s going to stay with you.”

“Yeah.”

“It _is_ good, right?”

“It’s good.”

“Abed?”

“Annie.”

“Are you okay? With this? I mean, I know this must be a lot.”

“It is a lot. But I’m okay.”

“Promise? You would tell me if you weren’t? It’s okay, you know. If you’re not.”

“I know, Annie. I promise, I’m fine. This is a good thing.”

“Of course it’s a good thing. Troy is coming home! Trobedison reunited!”

“Exactly. It’ll be great. I’m so glad you can be there for his homecoming.”

“Wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

“I’m going to go call everyone else. I’ll talk to you on Thursday, right?”

“Absolutely! I can’t wait. Tell everyone to send me their information and I can organize the trip.”

“Okay. Bye, Annie.”

“Bye, Abed.”

* * *

“Hello?”

“Hi, Britta.”

“Oh my gosh, Abed! How’s it going?”

“Fine. I have news.”

“What’s going on? Is everything okay?”

“Everything’s fine. Troy’s coming home.”

“Holy shit, are you serious?”

“Of course I’m serious, Britta. Why would I lie about Troy coming home?”

“No, you’re right, I was just...whatever. Doesn’t matter. Tell me everything.”

“He’s docking two weeks from Saturday. In Los Angeles.”

“Whoa, why is he docking in LA? That’s so crazy!”

“The, uh, lawyers are there. That he has to meet with. So he can get Pierce’s money.”

“Oh. Well, that’s convenient, isn’t it? And kind of crazy...”

“Uh-huh. He wanted me to see if you guys would be able to come out here for his homecoming. I already talked to Annie, and she thinks she can make it. You’d have to get a hotel. I don’t have room at my place. Sorry.”

“That’s okay. I bet Jeff and I can manage it. He’ll be home any second and I’ll ask him. How are you feeling about this?”

“Good.”

“You can be honest with me, you know.”

“I _am_ being honest with you.”

“It’s okay if you’re struggling a little with it, Abed. It’s a huge change, and I know change is hard for you sometimes. And, I mean, it’s Troy.”

“It _is_ Troy. And I’m _not_ struggling. And it’s not that big of a ch-- And you don’t have to worry about me. I’m just glad he’s coming home, and I hope you all can be here when he does.”

“Okay, okay. Well, if you need to talk, you know I’m here. Hey, Jeff just walked in, want me to give him the phone?”

_“Please.”_

“Hello?”

“Hey, Jeff.”

“Abed! Hey! What’s going on?”

“Troy’s coming home. He’s docking in LA two weeks from Saturday. He wants everyone to come meet him there if they can. Annie already said she could.”

“Why is he docking in LA?”

“Lawyers. The lawyers are there. For the money. Pierce’s.”

“You okay? You sound flustered.”

“I’m fine. Sorry.”

“It’s okay. I think Britta and I can make it. That’s the holiday weekend, right?”

“Right.”

“Cool. And we should probably stay in a hotel?”

“Yeah, my apartment is small. And, um, Troy is staying in it, so.”

“Oh, wow, okay. Cool. Well, that’ll be good for you guys. Right? Do you feel okay about it?”

“Yup.”

“Good. Well, plan on us being there. I’ll send along the flight information and stuff when I have it.”

“Cool. Annie will take care of the scheduling and everything once we have everyone’s information.”

“It’s a plan, then. Thanks for calling, Abed, it’s good to hear from you.”

“It’s nice talking to you, too. I’m looking forward to seeing everyone in a couple of weeks.”

“All right, well, I’ll talk to you later. And Britta says to say bye, also.”

“Bye to you and Britta.”

“Bye, Abed.”

* * *

“Hello?”

“Hi, Shirley. It’s Abed.”

“Hi, sweetie! How are you? This is a nice surprise.”

“I’m good. I’m calling to let you know that Troy’s coming home.”

“Really?”

“Yup.”

“Well, that’s excellent news! When?”

“Two weeks from Saturday. He’s docking in LA and he wants to know if the group would be able to be there when he arrives. I know it’s extra far for you, though, so I think he’ll understand if you can’t make it. Annie and Jeff and Britta have already said they can probably come. Oh, and you’d have to get a hotel room because I don’t have room in my apartment.”

“Whew, all right, that’s a lot of information. The good news is, I have a whole bunch of airline miles saved up, so I bet I can cover the flight that way, and maybe even the hotel room, too. I think I can make it work, I just have to check on a few things.”

“That _is_ good news. I’d love to see you.”

“Well, I’d love to see you too, Abed. Are you excited to see Troy?”

“Yeah. Really excited.”

“I bet. We were all pretty worried about you, you know, when he left.”

“I know.”

“Oh, honey, were we that obvious?”

“You still are. It’s okay, though. I appreciate that you guys care.”

“We love you so much.”

“I love you too.”

“It’ll be great to see you in a couple weeks. It’ll be great to see _Troy and Abed_ in a couple weeks.”

“Shirley, we…”

“What was that, Abed?”

“We’re going to have a great time, all together in LA.”

“We sure are. What a homecoming. How long has he been gone now?”

“Three years.”

“You know, in some ways it feels like a decade and in others I feel like I just spoke to him yesterday.”

“I can relate.”

“I’m sure you can.”

“It’s really nice to talk to you, Shirley.”

“I’m glad you called, Abed. I’ll see you soon.”

“Okay. Bye.”

“Bye, sweetie.”

* * *

“Jeffrey! To what do I owe the pleasure?”

“Hi, Craig. I had kind of a favor to ask you.”

“What kind of _favor_ would that be?”

“The kind of favor you do for a neighbor.”

“I’m listening.”

“No, I mean that literally. Can you bring in the mail and feed the fish if Britta and I fly out to LA in a couple weeks? Troy’s coming home from his boat trip.”

“You know, I had completely forgotten he was still on that boat.”

“Well, he won’t be for much longer.”

“I can bring in the mail and feed the fish. Are you sure that’s _all_ you need me to do?”

“I’m not sure what you’re even trying to imply, since I’ll be in California.”

“Oh, I don’t know either. Sometimes I get carried away.”

“Understatement of the century.”

“So why is Troy docking in LA?”

“Something about the lawyers for the inheritance being there? I’m not really sure.”

“Abed still lives there, right?”

“Yup.”

“Bet he’s happy.”

“He’s definitely happy. I don’t think Abed believed he would ever come back. Every time I try to talk to him about Troy, he clams up and changes the subject.”

“I always thought they’d make a cute couple.”

“They practically _were_ a couple. Except Troy’s straight. Maybe Abed, too. I’ve never been sure.”

“As far as _you_ know. Most of them still think you’re straight, too.”

“Fair point.”

“Want to come over later?”

“You should come over here. Britta has a date, so she’ll probably be out all night.”

“Perfect. What time?”

“Six good?”

“I’ll see you then, Jeffrey.”

“Bye.”

* * *

“Annie?”

“Hey, Jeff.”

“This is a surprise. How’s it going?”

“Not bad. I hope I’m not catching you at a bad time.”

“No, not at all. What’s up?”

“Well, I was kind of hoping to talk to you about Abed?”

“Ah.”

“I’m guessing he called you. He said he was going to call everyone.”

“Yup, Britta and I both talked to him earlier today.”

“Do you think you’re going to be able to go to LA?”

“Yeah, we should both be able to make it. How about you?”

“I’ll be there. I think...I think it’s going to be important for Abed to have us there.”

“What do you mean?”

“I just...this is kind of a big deal, Troy coming home. And you remember how Abed was when he left.”

“I do.”

“And we don’t know how his feelings might have changed over the past three years…”

“What feelings?”

“Did Britta not tell you? I told Britta ages ago, and I was sure she’d tell you.”

“Britta doesn’t tell me anything. At least, not anything interesting. What are you talking about?”

“The night after Troy left, Abed told me he _loved_ him. But he was half asleep and the next day he didn’t remember telling me, and we never talked about it again.”

“Huh.”

 _“Huh?!_ That’s all you have to say??”

“You can’t tell me that came as a shock to you, Annie. Do you _remember_ what they were like?”

“Well, yeah, but...this was _explicit confirmation_ that Abed felt that way. And we still don’t know if Troy did.”

“And now Troy is coming back, and he’s staying with Abed.”

“Yes! And Abed must be freaking out, but he would never say anything about it to us, because that’s how he is. And I just...he’s finally settled out there, and happy, and I’m worried about this throwing a wrench in that.”

“Alternatively, this could be the best thing ever for Abed, because the love of his life is coming back after three years.”

“I just worry about his ability to handle it.”

“He’s a grown adult, Annie.”

“I know. I know, and I love him so much, and I just want him to be okay, and it freaks me out that _he_ doesn’t seem that freaked out.”

“That’s Abed, Annie. You know that.”

“He’s different lately, though. I mean, the last several months he just seems more, like, relaxed? I think it’s all the yoga and the running and stuff. And it’s so great.”

“It _is_ great, and that’s Abed growing and being healthy and self-sufficient. You have to let him be that way, Annie. Trust him to handle this. Be there for him if he can’t, of course, but don’t assume that it’s going to be bad.”

“Yeah. You’re right. I know you’re right.”

“I know I’m right, too.”

“I’m still worried.”

“I know.”

“It’s Abed. I just want him to be happy.”

“He _is_ happy.”

“Okay. Fine. It’s fine. Everything will be fine.”

“Yes, it will.”

“I can’t wait to see you guys in a couple weeks. And I can’t wait to see Troy. Do you know if Shirley’s coming?

“I haven’t heard anything yet, but I hope she can make it. And I’m really looking forward to seeing Troy, too. I wonder if he’s changed.”

“I guess we’ll find out.”

“Hey, Annie, I’ve gotta run.”

“Hot date?”

“Something like that.”

“Is it Britta?”

“I’ll see you soon, Annie.”

“Tell her I said hi.”

“I will when I see her.”

“Which is tonight, for your date.”

“Don’t worry about Abed. He’ll be fine.”

“Bye, Jeff.”

“Bye.

* * *

“Hello?”

“Shirley?”

“Britta! Hi, sweetie. How are you doing?”

“I’m good. I was wondering if Abed called you.”

“He sure did. I can’t believe Troy is finally coming home!”

“I know! Will you be able to come out to LA?”

“Yes, I’m actually working on the arrangements right now.”

“Oh, that’s great! Jeff and I will be there. And I think Abed said Annie would, too.”

“I can’t wait to see all of you! It’ll be like a reunion!”

“Yeah! And it’ll be good for all of us to be there to support Abed.”

“Well, sure, of course. And Troy, and each other.”

“But especially Abed.”

“Why especially Abed?”

“Because he’s secretly in love with Troy.”

“Sweetie, I’m not so sure that was much of a secret. You remember how they were.”

“No, but he really _was._ He told Annie once. And then forgot he told her, and never talked to her about it again.”

“Oh, lord.”

“It must be on his mind, now that Troy is coming back. And you remember how he was when Troy first left. I’m just worried about him.”

“Well, we’ll all be there for him. We’ll take care of him.”

“Yeah. We will.”

“It’s going to be okay, Britta. We all take care of each other, remember?”

“Yeah.”

“Do you think maybe _you’re_ a little nervous to see Troy, and you’re projecting it onto Abed?”

“Hey, I thought _I_ was the therapist.”

“It was just a guess.”

“We used to be pretty good friends. Even after we broke up, and even though he and Abed were closer than he and I ever were. I’ve missed him a lot.”

“Of course you have, honey. And now you’re going to see him again, and he’ll have changed, and you’ve changed, too. And it’ll be like a new beginning.”

“That’s a good way to think about it.”

“I’ve had a lot of new beginnings.”

“I love you, Shirley.”

“Oh, I love you too. I can’t wait to see you.”

“Same. Hey, I have to go.”

“Ooh, do you have a date?”

“Sort of.”

“Is it with Jeffrey?”

“Shirley.”

“I was just curious!”

“You can be less curious.”

“Give him my love, honey.”

“I always do.”

“Goodbye, Britta.”

“Bye.”

* * *

“This is Frankie.”

“Hey, it’s Annie.”

“Oh, hey! How are you?”

“Pretty good. I just heard from Abed, and Troy is coming home!”

“Oh wow! You all must be so excited.”

“I’ve missed him so much. It’s going to be great. He’s docking in LA and we’re all flying out there in a couple of weeks to meet him.”

“Abed still lives in LA, right? That works out well.”

“Yeah, it definitely does. I...I hope Abed is okay. I’m a little worried about him, and Jeff told me to stop being silly, and I’m sure he’s right, but…”

“But Abed’s fragile, and you care about him a lot. No, I think it’s understandable that you’d be worried.”

“Thank you for saying that.”

“It’s true. I know how close the two of you are, how you watch out for him. Just make sure you give him the opportunity to be okay, too. Don’t plan only for the worst case scenario.”

“That’s smart.”

“I know. I mean…”

“I know what you mean.”

“Oh. Good.”

“Frankie, do you want to come to LA with us?”

“Me? I...don’t know Troy.”

“You know _us,_ though. You know Abed. And I know you’ll love Troy.”

“I don’t want to overstep my bounds.”

“I really don’t think anyone would mind. We’re all staying at a hotel anyway. But if it would make you feel better, I can run it by Abed and let you know. If you’re even interested in going.”

“It _would_ be great to see you, Annie.”

“I’ll talk to Abed.”

“If I do go, should I bring my steel drums?”

“Look, about the steel drums, Frankie…”

“I'm kidding, Annie. I know Troy doesn’t play them.”

“You do?”

“Sometimes it takes me a long time to catch on to things, but I usually catch on eventually. Also, Jeff’s delight over me learning to play was completely out of character. I asked him about it a year or so ago and he finally came clean.”

“I’m so sorry, Frankie.”

“I can hear you trying not to laugh. It’s fine. It’s...pretty funny, honestly.”

“It _is_ pretty funny.”

“Let me know what Abed says, okay?”

“Okay. I’ll talk to you soon.”

“Goodbye, Annie.”

“Bye.”

* * *

“Shirley?”

“Hi, Annie! How are you?”

“I’m good! I was just doing some planning for LA! Abed called you, right?”

“He sure did.”

“Will you be able to make it?”

“I sure will.”

“Oh, I’m so glad! It’s going to be so much fun!”

“I can’t wait to see Troy. And the rest of you, of course.”

“Same here.”

“I talked to Britta earlier. She was pretty worried about Abed.”

“I’m a little worried about Abed, too.”

“You ladies put your worrying energy into supporting him and I think you’ll all be just fine.”

“Yeah.”

“Abed’s strong. And this could be the best thing for him.”

“He doesn’t handle change well.”

“He survived when Troy left.”

“We should all just try to pay extra attention to how he’s doing.”

“I think I can manage that. Well, sweetie, I’ll email you my travel information when I have everything set, okay? I’m assuming you’re taking care of all the scheduling.”

“You assume correctly. I’ll see you soon, Shirley.”

“Goodbye, Annie.”

“Bye.”

* * *

“Hi, Annie.”

“Hey, Abed! How are you?”

“Good. How are you?”

“I’m fine! Hey, I wanted to update you on a few things, if you have a minute.”

“Sure.”

“So, it sounds like everyone is going to be able to come out there for Troy’s homecoming. I’m having them all email me their travel plans and then I’ll put together a schedule and send it to you.”

“That’s perfect.”

“Also, I wondered what you would think of Frankie coming along.”

“To LA?”

“Yeah.”

“She doesn’t know Troy.”

“Right, but she knows you, and us. And she’s heard a lot about Troy.”

“Okay.”

“Okay, like, you’re agreeing that she knows us and has heard a lot about Troy? Or okay, like, you’re cool with her coming?”

“Okay, she can come. I like Frankie and I know Troy will, too. And I bet she could use a vacation. And I bet you really want to see her, and that’s the real reason you invited her, and that’s fine, so don’t try to deny it.”

“Abed--”

“I can’t wait to see all you guys. It’ll be fun to have a reunion scene. We haven’t ever really had a big one like that. The closest was probably when Troy came back from A/C repair school, and that was just him and Britta and me.”

“How are you doing with this whole thing, Abed?”

“What thing?”

“With Troy coming back.”

“I’m glad he’s coming back.”

“Are you nervous to see him, after not hearing from him for such a long time?”

“Everyone’s always a little nervous before a reunion, I think.”

“He might have changed a lot in the last three years.”

“Annie. Can we talk about something else?”

“I just want you to know that however you feel about this, it’s okay. Even if you’re nervous or worried or afraid.”

“I know.”

“And we’re here for you no matter what.”

“I know.”

“Okay.”

“Thank you for looking out for me, Annie.”

“I just love you.”

“I love you, too.”

“I’ll send you that information when I have it, and I'll tell Frankie she’s welcome to tag along. And I’ll see you in a couple weeks, okay? And we’ll talk Thursday?”

“Sounds good.”

“Okay. Well...bye, Abed.”

“Bye, Annie.”


	5. The Final Frontier

The morning his friends are due to arrive, Abed goes for an extra long run. Usually he listens to music when he runs, but this time he doesn’t; this time he focuses on all of the individual sounds around him. The ocean waves crashing and the endless traffic, tires screeching and horns honking. The wind blowing and ripping through the palm trees, families chatting on the beach and kids laughing as they play in the water. The slapping of his shoes against the pavement and the harsh in-and-out of his breath. 

They are the sounds of his life, which is about to change drastically, and it’s a good change, the best change, but it’s a change nonetheless, and change is difficult for Abed. He is trying so hard to keep it together, but he feels like he’s vibrating with anxiety, and all he wants to do is run it out of himself, run until he’s too tired to feel anything else, run until he breaks free. 

By the time he circles back to his apartment his calves are burning, and it’s a good burn, and his shirt soaked with sweat and humidity, and the buzz of anxiety has dulled into a hum of exertion. He feels salty all over, and exhausted, his mind focused on nothing but his breathing. It’s good, it’s  _ so good, _ and when he gets inside he throws a beach towel on his bed and then collapses on top of it, taking note of every part of his body and how it feels, grounding himself in the moment. 

He checks his phone and there are a bunch of texts from Annie, nothing important, just her being excited. Everyone is scheduled to arrive in the late afternoon, and he’s going to meet them over at their hotel, and then they’ll have dinner together and visit. They’ll regroup in the morning to meet Troy.

Abed thinks he has his apartment pretty much ready for when Troy arrives. The plan is to find a bigger place to move into together once Troy has his inheritance money, so this really only needs to last them a little while. Abed has made sure everything is clean, and there’s some space in the dresser for Troy’s clothes, and...that’s about the best he can do, really. There’s just not that much space.

By the time his friends are due to arrive, the anxiety has come back, and there’s only so much Abed can do about it at this point. He plays with fidget toys and does some yoga, and it helps for a little while, but when he gets the text from Jeff that everyone is gathered, he’s vibrating again. It’s not too bad, or even particularly uncomfortable, it’s more of an awareness that he’s nervous, and it’s layered with excitement, because he’s missed his friends, and he really is looking forward to seeing them. The hotel where they’re staying isn’t too far from where he lives, and he decides to walk there, and that helps him calm down a little, too.

“Abed!” screeches Annie when he calls her from the lobby, and she comes down to meet him, brings him up to Jeff’s room, where everyone is waiting. His room is connected to Britta’s room, and the doors between them are open, so there’s plenty of space for all six of them. 

“Hi, everyone,” Abed says when he walks in, and Annie throws her arms around him, even though she just hugged him in the lobby and she held his hand while they took the elevator up to the room, and Abed thinks he should keep an eye on her, make sure she’s okay. 

“It’s so good to see you,” she murmurs, and he squeezes her tight.

“You too,” he says. “I miss you.”

“I miss you too. Can you believe Troy is finally coming home?” She lets go of him but stays close, like she doesn’t want anyone else to swoop in yet and steal him away.

“No,” Abed says truthfully. “I can’t. It feels like a dream.”

“It’s going to be fine,” she says, and Abed can’t tell if she’s saying it to him or to herself, and he finally decides just to ask her.

“Are you okay, Annie?”

She looks at him and opens her mouth and then closes it again. He tilts his head and waits for her to be ready to talk.

“Yeah,” she says, finally. “I am, it’s just...I don’t have friends like you guys in DC. I miss you. I miss  _ this.” _ She gestures to the room, to the people in it. 

“I understand,” Abed says.

“I know you do,” she says. “It’s just hard right now. But we’re going to be fine, both of us. And this is good, and seeing Troy is going to be good. Did he tell you what his plans are after this? After the reunion? Is he going back to Colorado?”

“I don’t know,” Abed lies, and he has to keep reminding himself, just one more day. One more day and then everyone will know, and Troy will be here for good, and everything will finally fall into place.

“Maybe he doesn’t know yet,” Annie muses. “I guess we’ll see. Anyway. I should stop hogging you, I know everyone else wants to talk to you, too.”

“It really will be okay, Annie,” Abed says. “You’ll find new friends. And we’ll still be here. Always.”

Annie smiles at him and nods, and then moves out of the way to make room for Britta.

“Hey!” Britta says, stepping up for a side-hug.

“Hi, Britta,” Abed says. “It’s good to see you. You look happy.”

“I  _ am _ happy,” she says. “Things are pretty good right now, and it’s really nice to be with all you guys, and I can’t believe Troy’s finally coming home!”

“I’m really glad you’re happy.”

“Are you okay, Abed? You seem kind of...frazzled.” Britta’s face is suddenly full of concern, which makes Abed uncomfortable.

“Frazzled?” he echoes, buying time while he tries to figure out how to deflect.

“Yeah. Are you nervous about seeing Troy?” She blinks at him through thick glasses.

“Kind of, I guess.” Abed shrugs.

“It’s been a long time,” she says pointedly. “I know it was hard for you when he left.”

“I know you’re a real therapist now, Britta, but that doesn’t mean--”

“Abed, I’m not speaking as a therapist, I’m speaking as a friend who saw you fall apart when your best friend went away.”

“I didn’t fall apart,” Abed says stubbornly.

“Annie told me she found you fully clothed and soaked in the shower.”

“That was  _ one time.” _

“Look, I just want you to be okay, that’s all. I know this is probably bringing up a lot of emotions for you, and it’s okay to feel them.”

“Thanks,” Abed says tensely, then glances over her shoulder. “Hi, Jeff.”

“Hey, Abed,” Jeff says, nudging Britta out of the way. As soon as she’s out of earshot, he says, “Sorry, I tried to get to you sooner but everyone is hugging everyone and it’s a little chaotic.”

“It’s okay,” Abed says, relaxing. “It’s good to see you. How was the trip?”

“Not too bad,” Jeff says. “It’s nice to be here. Good change of scenery. Are you excited to see Troy?”

“Yup,” Abed says. 

“I know it was hard when he left, but--”

“Are you dating Craig now?” Abed interrupts, desperate not to have to have this conversation again.

“What?” Jeff asks, trying to seem shocked and failing.

“It’s a yes or no question,” Abed says, and waits.

“But why would you…”

“Everyone thinks you and Britta are together,” Abed says. “I don’t. I think you two have a great platonic relationship and making it romantic would add too much drama and neither of you want that. I also noticed the way you and Craig were acting around each other at Thanksgiving. And your Netflix profile has had an extreme uptick in romcoms and classics lately.”

“That could be Britta,” Jeff protests.

“Britta has her own profile.”

“Wait, why do you still have access to my Netflix?”

“Three years ago you found out that I was using your account, and you still haven’t changed the password, Jeff. That’s on you. Now, are you dating Craig?”

Jeff grabs Abed by his upper arm and drags him into the bedroom.

“No one else knows, okay?” he hisses, and Abed grins.

“Why are you smiling?”

“That was all incredibly flimsy evidence, and you just went with it,” Abed says wryly. “I was only trying to change the subject. But I’m glad to know, and I’m happy for you. Does Britta know?”

“I think she suspects, but she hasn’t said anything yet,” Jeff says. “I can’t believe you.”

“It’s a good thing, Jeff. You don’t have to be embarrassed.”

“I haven’t told anyone that I like men,” Jeff admits.

“Besides Craig,” Abed clarifies.

_ “Obviously  _ besides Craig,” Jeff says, rolling his eyes.

“Would it make you feel better if I tell you that I like men, too?”

“Yes, actually,” Jeff says, and he sits down on the bed, and Abed sits down next to him.

“If I tell you something, can you promise not to tell anyone, even though you’re mad at me for tricking you into revealing your relationship?” Abed asks, because he just can’t do this for another minute, and he thinks Troy will understand.

“Of course,” Jeff says.

“I’m in love with Troy,” Abed begins.

“That doesn’t come as a huge surprise,” Jeff says.

“I’m not done,” Abed says, holding up his hand. “I’m in love with Troy and we’ve been in a long distance relationship for the last two years.”

“Wait, _ what?!”  _ Jeff is staring at him blankly.

“Troy and I have been together for the last two years while he’s been on the boat. We write emails and Skype regularly. But he asked me not to tell you guys, because he felt bad about not staying in touch with you. He just loves you all too much and he didn’t think he’d be able to get through the trip unless he established boundaries.

“Holy shit,” Jeff says. “So, all this time…”

“I’ve been lying to you, and I’m sorry,” Abed says flatly, and he feels bad, but he also feels relieved, and a little calmer, and that’s good.

“Wow,” says Jeff. “Sorry, I just...wasn’t expecting that. No wonder you’re so irritated with everyone asking if you’re okay, huh?”

“Yeah,” Abed says. “Was it that obvious?”

“I don’t think so,” Jeff says. “I just notice things like that more than the girls, I think.”

Abed nods. “I don’t like lying. But I get why Troy asked me to.”

“So  _ that’s  _ why he’s coming to LA,” Jeff says, clearly putting the pieces together. “And that’s why you were so awkward on the phone.”

_ “You _ try explaining it without telling the truth!” sputters Abed.

“Can I hug you?” Jeff asks, and Abed nods, turning towards him, and Jeff squeezes him tight. 

“Thanks,” Abed says quietly. “You’re good at that. You always have been.”

"Thanks for telling me the truth," Jeff replies. "I'm honored that you trusted me with this." 

"We should go back out there," Abed says. "I know this goes without saying, but...I won't say anything about Craig and you won't say anything about Troy?" 

"Correct," Jeff says with a nod, and they leave the bedroom. 

"Abed, honey!" Shirley exclaims the second they step out. "How are you?" 

"I'm good," Abed says. "It's nice to see you." 

"It's nice to see you, too. Are you excited to see Troy? It's been so long."

"I'm very excited," Abed says, hoping his smile doesn't seem too forced, and wishing there had been a way to avoid this. 

Suddenly, Jeff re-materializes next to him. 

"Shirley, do you have any pictures of your kids?" he asks. "I bet they're getting big." He makes a motion with his hand that Abed assumes means  _ get away while you can,  _ and Abed mouths  _ thank you  _ as he walks away. 

He sits down on the couch next to Frankie. 

"Hi, Abed,” she says warmly. “I'm really glad you invited me." 

"It's good to see you," he says, for what feels like the thousandth time, but each one has been sincere. 

"How is it living in LA?" she asks, and Abed launches into an update about his job and his life, and Frankie never once asks about Troy, and Abed loves her for that. 

It’s a nice evening overall, once they’ve all had a chance to settle and reconnect. They have dinner and go for a short walk on the beach. The Greendale people catch him up on what’s new, and Shirley tells them about Atlanta, and Annie opens up a little more about her loneliness, and there’s a lot of love and support and encouragement, and Abed loves that about his friends. He feels safe with them, and he’s so glad they’re here for this important moment.

Before he goes to bed that night, Abed emails Troy one last time. He tells him he can't wait to see him, and that he told Jeff about them and he hopes that's okay, and that he loves him so much. Troy writes back almost immediately, says he can't wait either, and he doesn't mind about Jeff knowing this late in the game, and he loves Abed so much, too, and Abed sleeps surprisingly well after that.

The next morning he is a wreck, though. From the moment he wakes up he can't stop shaking, and he doesn't know why he's so freaked out. He's pretty sure he knows what's going to happen, and he has control over his own actions, and he's going to see the love of his life in a matter of hours. 

It takes him four tries to button his jeans, and he's too nervous to eat anything, which probably isn't helping. His heart is pounding and he walks to the hotel again, hoping to use up some energy before they carpool to the marina. He runs part of the way, just because he can. 

When they all arrive at the marina, Annie brings out a hand painted sign that says, "WELCOME HOME, TROY!!!" which she appears to have lugged all the way from DC. Jeff claps a hand on Abed's shoulder and Shirley and Britta are bouncing a little. Frankie is standing still, looking the same as always, and Abed finds that weirdly comforting. They watch and wait and laugh and chat and then they see the  _ Childish Tycoon.  _

They're standing in a cluster and Jeff nudges Abed forward. 

"You go first," he says. "We'll be right here." 

Abed nods and then starts walking without waiting to hear what the others have to say. He's all nerves and excitement, and his eyes are on the boat, and it's like there's nothing else around, all that matters is this, is Troy, and then all of a sudden _ there he is.  _

Troy steps off the boat and Abed starts to run, even though he's not far at all now, and Troy looks up and sees him, and by the time Abed flings his arms around Troy both of them are crying, and then they're giggling, and then they're  _ kissing kissing kissing,  _ and Troy is an amazing kisser, just like Abed knew he would be, and Abed spins him around like in a movie, and then dips him and kisses him again like they'd planned, and Abed hears Annie shriek, and then they're laughing again. 

“You’re here,” Abed whispers in awe. “You’re here and you’re home and you’re really mine.”

“Yeah, buddy,” Troy says, his voice thick with emotion.  _ “Troy and Abed back together. _ Forever.”

“Are you ready?” Abed asks. “They’re going to have a lot of questions.”

“I’m ready for anything,” Troy says. “I think this is the greatest day of my life.”

“Can I kiss you one more time before we go meet them?”

Troy doesn’t answer, just throws his arms around Abed’s neck and kisses him hard on the mouth, and Abed sighs, and nothing could ever be better than this moment. Abed doesn’t think he has ever in his entire life felt so  _ whole. _

They walk hand in hand toward the group, and then Abed lets go and wraps his arm around Troy's waist instead, and they reach the group and everyone is just staring except for Jeff, who has the biggest grin on his face. 

"Hi," Troy says shyly. "I missed you all so much. Thanks for coming to meet me.”

Shirley, Britta, and Annie all start speaking very quickly at the same time. Abed holds a hand up, and they stop.

“You may be noticing that Troy and I are in a relationship,” he says, and no one says a word for a few seconds, and Abed taps his fingers together a little frantically. Troy reaches over and takes Abed’s hand, and Abed starts tapping Troy’s hand instead, and Troy squeezes gently, and Abed relaxes a little.

"Since _ when?!"  _ Annie blurts out. 

"Since, uh, 2015," Troy says sheepishly, and Annie's eyes bug out. 

"You've been in a long distance relationship for  _ two years,  _ Abed?" screeches Britta. "And you never said anything?" 

"Yes," Abed says. "I promised Troy I'd keep our communication a secret." 

“But why?” Shirley asks. “Why did you let us think no one had heard from you all this time, Troy? We missed you and were worried about you.”

“I’m sorry,” Troy says, his face crumpling. “I missed you all so much. I didn’t think I could make it through the trip if I was thinking about you and missing you all the time. So I thought the best thing would be to cut myself off from everyone.”

“Except Abed,” Britta says, and Abed can’t read the expression on her face.

“I couldn’t not talk to Abed,” Troy says in a small voice. “I just couldn’t. The eight months before I finally got back in touch with him were torture. Sometimes literal torture. There were pirates involved.”

“Wait,  _ what?”  _ Jeff exclaims.

“I’ll tell you about it later,” Troy promises. 

Abed sees Frankie hovering awkwardly on the edge of the group and pulls Troy over to her.

“Frankie, this is my boyfriend Troy,” Abed says, and Frankie smiles and holds out her hand, and Troy shakes it.

“It’s a pleasure,” she says. “I’ve heard a lot about you.”

“I’ve heard a lot about you, too,” Troy says. “It’s great to get a chance to finally meet you.”

“It’s cool seeing you two together,” Abed comments. “Cast members from two different seasons connecting for the reunion movie. Audiences love that kind of thing.”

“I missed you so much, buddy,” Troy says, burying his face in Abed’s chest. “It’s gonna be such a good movie.”

“There was never any question about that,” Abed agrees. “Should we all head back to my apartment and catch up a little bit?

“Let me just go grab my stuff,” says Troy. “I’ll be right back.” He turns around and heads back to the boat, and Abed resists the urge to follow. 

“Abed, this  _ whole time--” _ Britta starts to shout, and Jeff cuts her off.

“Just because Abed wasn’t suffering in the way we thought he was doesn’t mean he wasn’t suffering,” he says. “He was just doing his best. So maybe we should cut him a little slack and not all start yelling at him when he’s probably already pretty overwhelmed.”

Abed doesn’t say anything, because Jeff is right, he  _ is _ pretty overwhelmed, and that speech was unexpected, and so very  _ nice, _ and he doesn’t know how to react to it. Britta almost visibly deflates.

“I’m sorry,” she says. “We can talk about it later. I’d like to know more of the details. But I’m not mad, Abed.”

“Okay,” Abed says, and looks up to see everyone else nodding, and Annie steps up and gives him a hug.

“I can’t believe you kept that secret all that time,” she whispers. “Actually, you know what, I totally can. And I’m really happy for you guys.”

“Thank you,” he whispers back. 

Frankie grins and winks at him, and Shirley gives him a hug, too, and then there’s a  _ thud _ and they look up to see Troy surrounded by a few suitcases and a backpack.

“Shall we?” Jeff says, picking up one of the bags, and the girls follow suit.

“My apartment?” Abed asks, and points to each of his friends in turn. “My apartment? My apartment? My apartment? My apartment? My apartment?”

Their friends end up carrying all of Troy’s bags for him, so that Troy and Abed can hold hands the whole way there.


	6. The Motion Picture

It's crowded,  
the apartment is too small for this many people  
but they manage,   
some of them sitting on the floor,   
some on the edge of the bed

and Troy and Abed 

_(in the morning)_   
_(being normal)_   
_(sewn together)_   
_(in a bubble)_

are in the middle of it all. 

Abed hands Troy a glass jar  
full to the brim with trinkets:

_plastic figurines_   
_decorated pins and buttons_   
_arcade tokens_   
_funny shaped pencil erasers_

_(things that made Abed think of Troy)_

and he dumps it out on the bed  
so Troy can look through them  
and the others aren't sure why they're observing  
but they're fascinated by this;

it's like a time capsule  
 _a friendship capsule  
_ _a relationship capsule  
_ collected and preserved over years. 

Troy sifts through them  
examining every single one  
and Abed gazes over his shoulder, frozen

_waiting  
_ _watching_

and he catches the exact moment when Troy sees _it_

the way his eyes change shape  
and his hands start to shake  
and he picks it up gingerly  
like he's not sure it's real. 

It's a simple ring, nothing elaborate  
but Abed thought Troy would like it  
and now he thinks he was right

it's hard to tell, though,  
because everything has become chaotic very quickly. 

His friends are speaking but he's not listening,   
he's just watching Troy  
and wondering if he'll put it on  
(and wondering if he should say something)  
but Troy just looks at him and says, 

_Pause._

So Abed pauses, and his friends' voices  
turn to whispers   
as they wait and watch

and Troy reaches into his pocket  
and pulls out a little box  
and holds it out to Abed. 

Time stops 

Troy waits 

Jeff laughs 

Annie gasps 

Britta swears 

Shirley hums 

Frankie grins 

Abed

Abed

_Abed_

Abed takes it and opens it  
and he looks at Troy  
and Troy looks exactly how Abed feels:

amazed  
overwhelmed   
excited   
joyful   
_loved._

They put the rings on each other and then   
they kiss   
and it's everything,  
 _everything,  
_ _everything. _

Abed opens his mouth and says,  
 _Will you--_

and Troy cuts him off,  
 _\-- marry me?_

And _they didn't plan this  
_ and it's a movie moment  
and Abed doesn't even realize it until later

because for once he doesn't need that kind of frame  
to understand this experience,   
to process what's happening. 

He knows,  
 _he knows!  
_ and he understands  
and this is real  
and this is right  
and this is true. 

They don't even say yes.   
They don't need to.   
They do their handshake  
and kiss again  
and again  
 _and again  
_ and no one clears their throat or interrupts 

they let them have their moment  
and it's a long moment  
and it's a good moment. 

Finally, they sing it at the same time,   
soft and reverent,  
full of awe and wonder,  
in perfect harmony:

_Troy and Abed getting married!_

**_/timejump/_ ** **cut to:** **  
**

The wedding is perfect,  
it’s fun  
and silly  
and gay  
and full of homages  
and cookies  
and vows.

The wedding is shark themed--  
Troy’s choice--  
in honor of the shark they never jumped  
and Abed doesn’t complain  
(even though he’s not convinced it makes sense)  
because Troy is so excited about it.

The wedding is small,  
and some of their parents come  
 _and some don’t  
_ and they aren’t mad  
 _just disappointed.  
_ But they have each other now  
a new family  
born out of their found family. 

The wedding is at Greendale,  
because how could it not be?

Jeff and Craig  
show up together  
because they don’t feel like   
they have to hide it anymore  
which Abed considers a wonderful gift.

Annie   
shows up with her girlfriend,  
and they’re so happy,  
and she feels settled in DC, finally.

Britta   
is working on her Ph.D.  
and writing her dissertation on trauma  
and learning a lot.

Shirley  
has a beautiful bakery  
that’s doing really well  
and three very grown up sons  
who are doing even better. 

Frankie  
shows up with a man  
and everyone says, _wait, what?  
_ and then she introduces him  
as her brother  
and everyone starts whispering again.

Troy and Abed  
say _I do  
_ and kiss. **  
**

**_/timejump/_ ** **cut to:** **  
**

Their daughter

is named Carrie Geneva Nadir Barnes

after two women:

the late Hollywood icon  
who played a princess  
that became a general

and

the Constable who narrowly escapes death  
on a regular basis

so that she’ll always know what kinds of things  
strong women can do.

Their daughter

comes home with them  
when she is three days old

and she’s _so small_

and everyone is surprised to learn  
that Troy and Abed are _awesome_ at taking care of babies.

Their daughter

has two dads who stay up all night watching YouTube videos  
to learn things like

how to take care of her hair, or  
how to get her to eat vegetables, or  
how to use toddler sign language  
(because Troy in particular can’t _wait_ to talk to her)

and they make sure she is heard and respected  
and encouraged and supported

and always has a closet full of costumes  
and a Dreamatorium at her disposal.

Their daughter

is loved and cherished

and spoiled by her aunts and uncles  
 _(not relatives by blood, but by Greendale,  
_ _which feels stronger somehow)_

and Troy and Abed love being dads  
more than anything else in the world.

**_/timejump/_ ** **cut to:**

Abed becomes a famous film director.  
(Obviously.)

Troy follows the things that make him happy  
which end up being mostly  
Carrie and Abed  
and sometimes their friends  
if they need him. 

When he gets bored, he’ll fix the occasional air conditioner  
or take a few dance classes.

They never stop dreaming  
or singing  
or going on adventures  
or believing in each other.

They never stop being  
 _Troy and Abed._ **  
**

**_/timejump/_ ** **cut to:**

_They live happily ever after._


End file.
